my body is craving him today among other things.


i threw myself out into the open world today against my will. into traffic, loud strangers, and hot air. i found a beautiful sunset and a reminder of who i once was. i remembered how music saved me, and found me at blissful or awful times, and how my passion for music always remained unchanged among pure inconsistency. it would make me feel more than i typically allow, or even less if need be. there is something so freeing about listening to my headphones in solitude. music set to the passing images of daily life seem to make living desirable.

i've decided to let optimism and pessimism battle it out themselves for my attention today. maybe it's just the cream soda and twilight zone marathon, but optimism is winning. my mind has been paging through the simple things that i find pleasing. my mind seems to be satisfied at the mere thought of them. it reminds me that my heart finds love in the midst of turmoil. it seems as though my mind has been enjoying declaring apocalypse and watching my body attempt to fight back.