love never fails.

i find such beauty in our relationship. i don't believe it could have begun at a better time. i like to rehearse the story of us in my mind, because it doesn't sound like a story i would ever have been gifted enough to call my own. even while remembering the smallest memory of when you came into my life, my stomach feels weightless.

i truly believe that finding love saved my life. it's been over a year since i woke up next to you for the time, and i still can't believe it when i open my eyes in the morning. i don't really believe that it's insecurity that makes me question why you love me, it's purely disbelief, because nothing has ever allowed "having" and "wanting" to be synonymous for me, and waking up to you in the morning still feels just as amazing as it did the first day you came home.

i suppose what is really on my mind this morning is that i feel sadness in seeing the things our relationship has taken away from you. i was (and am) attracted to you the way you were before you and i were together, in a raw state, living day by day, kept safe by routine. unknown to me, finding me made you wander back home, and i feel that when you did that you gave up a lot. we have given each other so much from the start, just to survive, and now that's all we know. i remember going to lunch at school and getting a phone call from you telling me that you haven't found a ride to work yet, and missing my class just to be sure you wouldn't lose your job. and on my way home finding money you had inconspicuously put inside of the cup-holder in my car to make sure i had gas to make it home, and food to eat when i got there. we've always been responsible for each others survival. and in some ways i wish our relationship would've had the chance to maintain it's simple innocence for longer than one week, and in other ways i see how it's made us so close.

the thing of it is... i simply cannot stand to ask you to remove things from your life that make you happy. if i make you as happy as i think i do, don't you think it's odd to be taking away the things that keep you happy? but still. if you could not be happy with only me, then i suppose you cannot be considered as happy at all.

"love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant. love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. love never fails."